 | |||||||||
 | |||||||||
| Second Interviews/Traveling for Interviews Interviewing Main Learn how to Dress for Success |
Etiquette Now Networking for Jobs and Internships |
||||||||
|
Interview Dining Etiquette
Interviewing can be nerve-racking; interviewing over a meal can be particularly stressful; but with a few tips from the UC Davis Internship & Career Center (ICC) on successful dining etiquette, you will be prepared for the challenge of presenting yourself over a meal. If you’re wondering why employers pay the extra expense of interviewing over meals, you’re not alone. To put it simply, it’s very beneficial to them. Screening (initial) interviews provide information on your background and educational experience, but offer very little insight into your social skills and abilities. Employers believe they can tell a lot about a potential employee by the way they eat or interact socially. For this reason they often hold longer, more detailed interviews in social settings such as restaurants. They assume the way you eat with them is the way you will act as a representative of their organization with future clients. The use of restaurants to “talk business” while evaluating how socially savvy you are has become very popular over the last few years, so it would be wise to expect and prepare for this during your recruitment process. Pat yourself on the back for making it this far (very few candidates have), but start preparing now; that way you can turn this stressful situation to your advantage and really impress employers with your social skills and expertise. Remember, the ICC is here to help reduce your stress and bolster your chances of success. If you have any unanswered questions, stop by and talk with us. It will also help you to remember that etiquette is nothing more than the grand set of all good manners, and a way for you to show your respect, professionalism, and consideration for others – it isn’t meant to be difficult. Something else to remember is that we are presenting a point of view that will help you in most situations based on typical U.S. customs and practices. You may encounter many different cultures and practices centered on meetings over meals that are very different from this perspective and are encouraged to learn more about each one of them. An excellent resource for you is the book “Kiss, Bow, or Shake Hands: The Bestselling Guide to Doing Business in More than 60 Countries” by Terri Morrison. You can read this in our Career Resource Library located in 215 South Hall. Before the Meal
Dressing for the Interview Dressing for an interview over a meal involves the same preparations and requirements as dressing for a regular interview – so dress professionally! Refer to our “Dress for Success” page if you need advice about this. It is proper etiquette to keep your jacket on during the meal; but if the host removes his, you can do so as well. Fold it neatly over your chair. If your host doesn’t and you are uncomfortable with it on, ask if it is okay to remove it. You might consider wearing something particularly comfortable and light but still professional in case you need to leave your jacket on.
What to Order
If possible, do some research on the restaurant ahead of time. Most menus can be found on-line, so think about what you might want to order and have a few ideas in mind – this is particularly important for those with special diets, vegetarians and vegans. Remember the purpose of an interview over a meal isn’t the food, it’s the interview. If you find the menu too restrictive and want something not offered, you may have to grin and bear it with a limited selection such as a salad. It is wise not to order messy foods like BBQ, pizza, spaghetti with sauce, fried chicken, big sandwiches, whole crab or lobsters, or anything you would eat with your hands. No licking fingers – ever! You may also want to avoid loud, crunchy foods such as corn on the cob, celery, etc., or foods with heavy odors such as garlic that draw unwanted attention to yourself or cause bad breath. Don't order expensive entrées; order within the average price range of listed entrées and try to keep costs less than that of your host. If you do not regularly eat spicy food, don’t order a spicy entrée to avoid bad reactions. This is not the time to experiment with strong flavors that may cause you to need water, or cough/sneeze, etc. Do order food that is easy to cut into small bite-size pieces and that you are comfortable eating (this will help avoid getting caught with a mouth full of food). If you are in doubt about what to order, consider taking a cue from your host; ordering something in the same price range. If what your host orders sounds good, it’s fine to say “That sounds interesting, I think I’ll try it.” If the host suggests an appetizer, try to find something similar or ask them for a suggestion. The same goes for dessert. Many hiring managers know that potential employees are nervous and looking for guidance or assistance; so it’s acceptable to ask for a recommendation. Most often the host will choose a favorite restaurant and will have more experience with menu selections.
Tips for Extra Baggage
Put your briefcase or purse either under the table or next to your chair. Only eating utensils should be placed on the table. Turn cell phones and pagers off. A ringing phone will cause unwanted distractions and suggest your priority is not the interview. If there is an urgent reason why you absolutely must have your cell phone on, make sure it is set to vibrate so you will know when it rings without alerting everyone else at the table.
Be Polite
Wait until your host sits or asks you to sit before you take your seat. Be polite! Remember the basics - say “please” and “thank you” to the host and your server, as well as all other wait staff and restaurant patrons (basically, be polite to everyone). It is also a good idea to address all people by proper titles – Mr. and Ms., or Sir and Ma’am. Many employers view restaurant employees as potential customers or clients and pay close attention to how you treat them. During the Meal
Utensils
Put your napkin on your lap once everyone is seated. Do not start eating until everyone at your table has been served and the host starts. This is especially true if at a catered event; wait until the host takes his/her napkin before you take yours and start to eat. That is the host’s cue to the serving staff to begin serving the first course. Your salad fork will be on the far left, your entree fork will be next to it. Your dessert spoon and fork will be above your plate. An easy way to remember which utensil to use first is to start at the outside and work your way in. Although there are several acceptable ways to hold utensils during a meal, it is best to hold the fork in whichever hand you are most comfortable, keeping the prongs facing up rather than down (like you are scooping the food rather than spearing it!). Keep your knife at the top of the plate after its first use. Keep your elbows off the table, have good posture (sit up straight), and never talk with your mouth full or eat with your mouth open! You may also want to take small bites. This will assist you if someone asks a question and you have to finish before answering. See our section on Cross-Cultural Interviewing over Meals for more information on eating styles.
Dining Etiquette
Never season your food without first tasting it. This can be viewed as an insult to the chef, and observant employers may view you as someone who makes uninformed decisions, not as someone who gathers all the facts before proceeding. Also, if you must pass the salt or pepper, pass them together. If sharing a sauce or dressing, spoon some onto your plate and pass it on. If you order soup, the polite way to eat it is to spoon the soup across the bowl away from you. There is less chance of spilling it in your lap or on the table. When it comes to eating bread; tear off a piece, butter only that piece over your plate, and eat it rather than biting into your dinner roll.
Alcohol
It's very unwise to order alcohol during an interview – even if the employer does. You don’t want to be under the influence of alcohol when being asked interview questions. On the exceedingly rare occasion that the employer strongly encourages you to have a drink and you feel it is safe, keep it to one round and try to order a conversational drink such as a glass of wine (not hard liquor).
Finishing the Meal
If you need to leave the table, politely ask to be excused, wipe your mouth, and place your napkin on the seat or the arm of your chair. When you've finished eating, move your knife and fork to the "four o'clock" position with the prongs of the fork facing down so the server knows you're done.
Compliments
Don’t criticize the food, staff or setting. Even if you didn’t enjoy the food or it wasn’t as good as you had expected, this is not the time to be critical. You want to leave the interviewer with good memories, not criticisms, so consider complimenting the food and the restaurant’s environment.
The Basics
Reinforce your professionalism and your ability to communicate effectively by speaking clearly and avoiding "uhs," "you knows," and slang during conversation. Remember to relax, listen, and participate actively in the discussion, especially if it is a group interview. Also remember this is not the time to bring up controversial topics such as politics. You don’t want the employer to remember you as the candidate who had significantly different political views or as the one who couldn’t keep your views to yourself during a business function with potential clients.
Questions to Ask
Before going to the restaurant, decide on what you want to accomplish. Plan your questions ahead of time. This will help you in case things get off track. You want to make sure all of your questions get answered, and having a list of questions may come in handy if your host(s) likes to ask questions and eat while you answer – not affording you a chance to eat. This way you can reciprocate and finish your meal at approximately the same time. You will also look more informed and prepared for the interview. Keep in mind this is probably a second or third interview, so your questions should be specific and thought-out, and remember: Eating is not your primary objective. It is also a good idea to prepare questions about the interviewer’s professional background. There are many benefits to this. These questions may generate a real conversational exchange, give you something significant to refer to in your follow-up thank you letter, and give you first-hand information about how to succeed in that industry from someone who has already been there. Here are a few sample questions:
Questions NOT to ask Avoid asking questions that are answered in the company’s annual report or employment brochure. Recruiters are familiar enough with their own information to recognize when you haven’t done your homework. If some information in the annual report isn’t clear to you, by all means ask for clarification. Also, avoid talking about salary. Salary negotiations can take place later, more appropriate time. If the recruiter brings up salary, it is okay, but you shouldn’t be the one to initiate it. Avoid asking any personal questions or questions that will put the recruiter on the defensive. This includes questions such as the interviewer’s educational background, marital status, past work experience and so on. Finally, don’t ask questions that have already been answered during the interview. If you have prepared a list of questions and some of them have been addressed during the interview, do not repeat them unless you need clarification.
Humor
Showing a sense of humor might be good for most social settings, but when interviewing, you will want to use discretion. You never know what the comical taste of your host(s) may be, so it’s best to play it safe and leave humor for a more appropriate time. In short, don’t tell jokes unless you are sure it is okay or if the host asks you to (very rare). Light banter is probably okay, but again – use discretion. Keep personal information limited – even if it is a comical event about you that is related to the subject at hand. You don’t want a potential employer thinking your actions as a representative of this company may not be taken seriously or may be considered comical by others. If the employer tells jokes, it’s okay to laugh politely, but don’t get too carried away. If an employer tells an off-color or inappropriate joke, you are not obligated to laugh. How you handle that is entirely up to you. Sometimes job candidates laugh out of embarrassment. Some may respond impassively with no facial response. Others even walk out of the interview. Either way, humor something you should think about before the interview because your use of and response to it may have an impact on the outcome of the interview. As you prepare to leave the table, gently wipe your mouth with your napkin, fold it, and place it on the table next to your plate. Let the prospective employer pay for the meal. The person who invited you will expect to pay both the bill and the tip. Remember to say "thank you" and compliment the food – even if it wasn’t to your liking. Remember – employers usually choose restaurants they are familiar with (and like); so an insult to the chef is also an insult to the host’s choice of restaurants and palate. “Follow-up” on the interview requires a thank you note reiterating your interest in the job and any important details you may have forgotten to mention during the meal. Add a personal memory such as, “It was great talking with you about living in San Francisco,” or “I appreciated the racquetball tips,” or something that shows you were attentive and interested in conversation during the meal. This helps jog the employer’s memory and differentiate between you and the other candidates. Do’s and Don’ts – a recap:
Things to Remember
It's Not About the Food
If you go into a social function such as an interview over a meal (or even a gathering such as a reception) thinking about how fortunate you are to get a free meal, you probably won't succeed beyond the evening. Social functions are about one thing - social interaction. Don't focus on the food, focus on presenting yourelf in the best light. Be engaging, talk to people, listen, and put your best foot forward.
Evaluating the Company/Culture
Remember, interviewing goes both ways. Not only is the employer evaluating you, this is also your chance to evaluate the employer to see if this company is a good match for you. As we mentioned earlier, most hosts understand their guests may feel uncomfortable making food selections and look to them for guidance. Good hosts/managers will assist you in getting through this and take the effort to make you feel comfortable. Look for that support and use it to evaluate their character. Also, remember to do research on the company before the interview so you can answer questions concisely and thoroughly and discuss items related to the organization. Research is the key to preparation.
Desserts and After-Dinner Drinks
It’s best not to finish eating before your host. That makes it awkward for both of you. You also don’t want your host to eat or drink alone; so if they decide to have dessert, coffee or tea, you should take their lead and join in. Use the same discretion choosing a dessert item as you would in choosing an entrée, and again, don’t be afraid to ask for a recommendation.
Mishaps and Accidents
How you handle mishaps during an interview can be just as important as your answers to the interview questions. Be calm about unexpected events and try not to draw attention to yourself. If you drop a utensil, leave it and ask a waiter for a replacement. If you spill something, discretely clean it or ask the waiter for assistance. If you spill something on yourself, politely excuse yourself and attend to it in a restroom. Conversational Tips If your host is from another country, please consider this: Executives from many other countries consider it to be extremely rude to “talk business” during a meal. If this is the case, consider talking about broader topics and leaving business for a more appropriate time. Remember, diplomacy comes in many forms, and knowing what to expect will help you land the job and more importantly, avoid being labeled the ugly American. For more tips on interviewing with hosts from abroad, do some research on relevant countries. You will be surprised at what you find. Internet searches on “International Dining Etiquette” or “Cross Cultural Dining Etiquette” will yield some good results. Also remember that using idioms, catch phrases, and colloquialisms may not be easily understood by non-Americans. Though part of casual conversation here, they are regional and often misunderstood when conversing with someone who speaks English as a second language or doesn’t hear them very often. You may have “gone the extra mile” on a project, had a “knee-slappin’ good time” at the interview, or plan to “keep tabs on” a suggestion, but if the intended audience doesn’t understand you, then it was a wasted effort that put you in an awkward position. Different Styles of Eating Cross-cultural interviews provide a unique set of dining challenges. Though most people in the United States use the “American” style of eating (fork in right hand, prongs up while you eat), if you are participating in a cross cultural interview; you might want to do some research on the “Continental” style of eating (very popular outside the U.S.). The Continental style involves holding the fork in your left hand with the prongs pointing down and the knife in your right hand. Do an Internet search on “continental style eating.” You will find plenty of information if you need to brush up on these skills. Etiquette Now Etiquette Now is a locally owned business that prepares people for professional events by teaching them professional etiquette. Topics include sit-down dinners (American and Continental Style) , appetizers/refreshments, and other social functions. Owner Rebecca Black has educated thousands of people and helped them prepare for success. Read articles about etiquette on the Etiquette Now site. |
|||||||||
Back to Top
Maintained by Ken Barnes of Liberal Arts & Business,
Room 211, South Hall. 530.752.2011.
Maintained by Ken Barnes of Liberal Arts & Business,
Room 211, South Hall. 530.752.2011.